3.75 ( )

Twelve-year-old Jewish Chinese-American Ana is a champion figure skater who lives with her mom, who works hard to pay for lessons, costumes, and choreography. But there are a lot of changes happening this summer: Ana is switching rinks, away from her best friend Tamar; she meets Hayden, who is trans, and he mistakes her for a boy; and she gets to work with a new choreographer, but the Sleeping Beauty program Miss Lydia develops for Ana doesn't feel right for her. Ana struggles to figure out why she feels so uncomfortable wearing a skirt and having people think she's a girl, when she IS a girl...right? Through Hayden, she learns about pronouns in English and other languages, and learns the term nonbinary, but it takes her some time to tell her coach Alex, her mom, Tamar, and Hayden. Like many young, disciplined athletes, Ana is more mature than many other kids her age, and ultimately she finds a way to tell the truth and mend fences with old and new friends.

See also: Different Kinds of Fruit by Kyle Lukoff

Quotes

"Whenever I need to ask my mom for something, I make sure she's in a really good mood first. Then I tell her why it's important to me, so she knows I'm serious. Maybe you could do something like that with your parents?" (Ana to Faith, 192)

I'm still hiding who I am from all the people who matter. (218)

It may be the perfect size for me, but it definitely doesn't feel like a good fit. (223)

I know lying is never okay, but maybe sometimes it's necessary. (228)

Every choice I make costs something. (284)

How long will I have to keep pretending if I never speak up? (303)

"Sometimes the people we love form ideas about who we are that don't fit with the reality they've just discovered." (Alex to Ana, 314) ( )

This is an adorable book for late primary / early secondary school readers about an ice skater discovering their non-binary identity. It is a lovely blend of the excitement of competitive figure skating, the difficulties of being poor in a sport mostly done by rich people, the challenges of keeping old friends while making new friends, and how to come out to the people who love you.

It is very well pitched for the target age group, with the flip-side of this being that to my cynical brought-up-in-the-time-of-section-28 it is amazingly rose tinted. Maybe this is what coming out as a 12 year old in San Francisco really is like nowadays. Maybe it's not at all what it's like, but the book wants to paint an optimistic vision of what it should be like, to have your friends and family love you and accept you. There is mild interpersonal tension, but most of the problems are in Ana's head, trying to pluck up courage to tell people, and when they finally do tell their mum, she says she's not sure she understands, but it is immediately big hugs, and I love you, and a walk on the beach to have a heart to heart. Maybe it is good to give people a template about how they should support people who are coming out. Maybe fluffy feel good books are a nice comfort read. It does feel a little unrealistic though, and like the harder bits of Ana's coming out are swept under the carpet. ( )

That was an excellent middle-grade/intermediate LBGTQIA novel. It never felt 'educational' as Ana explored her gender identity. When she learned about gender identity and what this might mean for her it felt natural and gentle, but also incredibly meaningful. The family and friendship connections were done well and I really enjoyed the figure skating descriptions as well. I thoroughly recommend adding this to middle grade/intermediate libraries. ( )

Mentioned in a blog post at https://booksbeyondbinaries.blog/2020/05/25/be-our-guest/