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Why do I suppose my life is fascinating enough to write about? Love? Hmm, between my mom, dad and myself, we've racked up thirteen marriages-if not romantic, certainly optimistic. Regret? Well, if embarrassing, eye-squinting, throat closing, breathless, cringing describes it...I've got a few tales to tell, like budget plastic surgery and herding roaches at a party. Accidental nudity? My nudity is about as spontaneous as a space shuttle launch-even so, there's still the unexpected.